Taking a Risk

It’s been quite the whirlwind relocating back to Canada. I quit a high paying job and decided to come back to Canada for comfort. It was a huge risk to do that, because stepping into the unknown always feels terrifying for me. I moved back to be with my family though, something that I sacrificed not being around for seven years while I worked away. I missed them terribly. I thought that if I just move back and just find any design job that I can just resume my peaceful life of being a designer.

That didn’t happen. I did, end up finding a design job but it didn’t work out. I was wrongfully terminated because I did what I always do, ask user experience questions. I’m just not willing to do any design work that doesn’t have adequate design thinking behind it because I value the work that we use out there; and with the mass amounts of content and devices we use; we all deserve to have something that’s at least been vetted through a design process.

I again tried to apply for more remote positions and even local jobs. I got several interviews but I noticed during the interviews that I didn’t know, what I wanted to work on. I couldn’t answer their questions when they asked that. That I confidently answered questions on what I did in the past; that when I was asked on what I wanted to do; I had no response. It was even scarier that somehow, now that I have the freedom to choose what I want to work on that not knowing was going to be the thing that really doesn’t get me the job.

I felt frustrated and less of myself. I didn’t know what to do. I had a portfolio with all this work but somehow still couldn’t find anyone to hire me.

I told my husband about everything yesterday and how I once again offered to be everything to everyone. I was even creating a new business plan for my freelance work where I would offer to do all work for everyone!

My husband, listening to this stopped me. “You need to do what you want to do, Wynne.” And for me, I know what that is. I really love design consulting and facilitating workshops. That’s truly what I feel confident at doing. So, I’m going to stick by that. It’s actually what I said during interviews too, when they asked me.

I also noticed that I did everything for everyone the way that they wanted to because I wanted to please them. I thought that by pleasing them, them being my previous directors and managers that I would be liked; and that I would then get promoted. And that somehow, I would feel safe. Safe from being overlooked. Safe from being laid off. That if I, just conformed and did whatever anyone asked me to do; that I would just be accepted. And for a whole decade that’s what happened. I didn’t get overlooked. I never got fired (well, until I spoke my truth). I never got laid off. Sure, I felt safe but I didn’t know how to stand up for who I really am and what I truly believed in.

I believe in making work on purpose. I believe in intentional product design.

We are surrounded by new devices, services and experiences everyday. We have an excess of it all. I want to be able to make products that are validated by people. Which is what product design is:

Product design is the process of identifying a market opportunity, clearly defining the problem, developing a proper solution for that problem and validating the solution with real users.

I’ve updated my website, as you can see with no options to do one-off freelance work but only option to consult and help small business grow, through design thinking. I’ve seen the powers of it at work in the past and I will stand by it.

I’m also taking a few courses on Coursera today and going to apply for that Consultation job at Deloitte :)! Wish me luck!

Wynne

And since it’s Monday and all, here’s my favorite Tina Turner, I hope that you don’t ever lose you :) !